Do you ever find yourself sitting at a table at a restaurant that is super wobbly?
Like so wobbly, that you’re worried if you move anything, it will tilt and all the items will fall into your lap?
The problem, usually, is that one (or more) of the legs of that table are too short, and not even with the others. Without all legs being even and sturdy, the table will never be fully balanced.
So why am I talking about tables? It will make sense, I promise.
A few weeks ago, I started to feel the unbalances in my life completely taking over. Everything seemed unorganized, chaotic, and all over the place. It was stressing me out!
I knew something needed to change, but without knowing exactly what the problem was, I couldn’t fix it.
That’s when I started writing out to-do lists. For me, seeing it written down on paper makes it easier for me to focus on what needs to be done; and then check it off as I do! (Plus I’m old school and I love writing things in my planner instead of in a note on my phone.)
As I was working on compiling things into lists, I noticed there were 4 groups kind of forming on their own; 4 categories if you will. So then, the huge nerd that I can be, I decided to instead make my lists into a big chart, showcasing each category.
And isn’t that so weird? It looks like a table… with 4 legs. 🙂
In order for the table (you) to be fully balanced, you need to care for and make each important category (table legs) even.
As you can see from my image, my “table” has 4 legs, or categories. Each of us is unique, and so there’s not right or wrong amount of categories you need or want to attach to your table, as well as no expected category types.
I’ll run through my own categories to explain how I work on making them balanced, to give you an idea of how to balance your own!
My entire life, I have been a very physically active and relatively healthy person. I was a tom boy growing up, playing in the woods and the dirt, and doing every sport on the planet that I could possibly do!
Now, I make physical fitness and health a major priority. Here are a few things I focus on:
- Currently I am on a meal plan and fitness plan catered to me, through L8r Lifestyle. Check them out, they’re amazing!
- I work out 5 times a week, with heavy lifting and HIIT cardio. 2 Rest days.
- My meal plan is catered to my height, weight, age, and what I want to accomplish. It’s real food, and meal prepping is a must!
- I make sure I eat enough of the food my body needs, and also every once in awhile throw in a cheat meal. Because #treatyoself
- I am a total grandma when it comes to sleep. I aim to be in bed by 10-10:30 pm during the week.
- I’ve thrown my back out 3 times in the last 6 months. Yes, I absolutely feel like I’m old and falling apart!
- I’ve been very smart about listening to my body, and when something is injured or hurting I rest and try to stretch, and do what I can to let things heal.
- I stay active as much as I can outside the gym:
- Sand volleyball
- Basically anything outside!
This category in all honesty has felt a little depleted lately for me.
With everything I have dealt with the past few years, I hope it is understandable for me to feel this way.
And no, I wouldn’t say I am having a crisis of faith by any means; I’m just working on more ways I can feel closer to God in my personal life. It isn’t a crisis, just a phase of my life where I am transitioning and growing in this area – kind of like spiritual Feng shui, where I’m just moving things around inside myself to rebalance and feel harmonized again.
And it is just that; personal. Each of us will feel that spiritual closeness and balance in different ways.
- I feel spiritual closeness in nature. Hiking alone is one of my favorite things to do, where I can go reflect in God’s beautiful creations about everything I’m feeling and wanting to feel.
- I also feel spiritually close to God when I engage in very honest personal prayer. We have some real talk. He knows me and He loves me despite all of my flaws and shortcomings; and in my earnest and humble nightly prayers with Him I feel so much love and peace.
- When I am doing service for others, I feel so spiritually balanced and my heart is so full. I feel the tiniest, most minuscule, fraction of a fraction of how much our Creator loves each of us. It is an incredibly overwhelming feeling.
If spirituality is one of your categories, do what makes you feel centered. There is no specific right or wrong way to go about it.
This category has been a rough one. Anyone who has been through any sort of traumatic event, will understand.
As I’ve explained before about PTSD, it’s not something you can just flip a switch and be done with. It takes time, patience, and lots of work. Feeling psychologically unbalanced has many different repercussions, such as anxiety, depression, self-doubt, and fear of something triggering a past traumatic experience.
Self-care and self-love are two of the biggest things I have been focusing on to recover and rebuild my life after everything completely shattered.
- Positive affirmations are amazing, and really do help! Read about them here.
- I started going to therapy. I honestly believe anyone and everyone can benefit from therapy, but especially someone who has been through anything traumatic.
- I take time everyday to meditate alone, even if it’s just for 10 mins. Finding that time to really zone in on my inner balance makes a huge difference.
- I love to read, and have been reading any book I can get my hands on in regards to recovering, finding my true joys and passions in life, chasing my dreams, and overcoming the trials that I’ve been given.
If you know me, you know I also struggle with this category. Ever since being thrown head first with weights attached to me in the deep end of dating and being in the singles scene again, I have had to make a real effort to be social. It’s so hard guys!
But I’ve made some progress.
- I only do what makes me happy. If I don’t want to go to something, I don’t. If I do, I go!
- Why let anyone force me to do something I know will not make me happy? Life is too damn short to let other people decide it for you!
- Hang around positive people who lift you up, instead of bring you down
- A few years ago I hung out with a crowd that was negative, and they were so mean to me! Once I broke away from them, I was a lot happier.
- Remember that it’s ok to not hang out with someone if they are toxic to your happiness in any sort of way.
- I’ve grown to appreciate quality friends over quantity. The ‘popular’ ‘cool’ crowd is not always going to make you happy!
So there you have it, my 4 table legs. When each of these categories feel balanced, then my life in general does as well.
If you keep focusing on balancing your life, than it will become so through your effort. It’s the whole “if you build it, it will come” mentality reminiscent from Field of Dreams; If you believe you can balance your life than it can happen!
Stay positive, prioritize what’s important, and focus on balance.